February

by Lisa Moore

In February of 1982, the gigantic oil rig Ocean Ranger sank off the coast of Newfoundland. All 84 men on board drowned. Overnight, Helen O’Mara, happily married mother of three (and pregnant with her fourth) becomes a widow. Helen must contend with the sudden loss of her husband and find the strength to carry on and raise her children by herself.

Moore brilliantly conveys Helen’s loneliness after Cal’s death and her struggle to be a decent mother. She and Cal had been young sweethearts and very much in love when they married. Her memories and thoughts of Cal evoke a strong, tender relationship. 

Somehow Helen had picked up the idea that there was such a thing as love, and she had invested fully in it. She had summoned everything she was, every little tiny scrap of herself, and she’d handed it over to Cal and said: This is yours.” (p. 49) 

Devastated when that is taken from her, Helen seems to be in shock for awhile and feels cut off from everyone else, that she is "outside" or "banished". But she doesn't want the children to know what has happened to her. At all costs they must think that everything is all right, that she is all right and that she will continue to look after them, and so she does homework with them, does her chores and housework … 

Helen folded laundry. Matching socks was an act that looked very much like matching socks. She looked exactly as though she were in the world … And when she was done there would be an actual pile of socks.” (p. 21)

Of course, the more she pretends and the longer this goes on, the better she gets at it. But her children also become more sophisticated and harder to fool, so she has to do more and more, eventually working, sewing, taking up yoga, fixing the house… All of this leads her back to being in the world and not “outside” any more.

Through Helen’s personal struggle we also gain some understanding of the devastating effect the accident had on the community. Cal’s death leaves Helen, their children and his own parents, bereft and abandoned. When Helen’s father-in-law calls to tell her about identifying Cal’s body, we feel their sorrow as they talk or don’t talk on the telephone. The silences between them are as eloquent as their speech. But 84 men died that night and each one — husband, son, father, uncle or friend — left a hole in the lives of those left behind.

Moore’s description of the men’s drowning is harrowing. Although this is a fictionalized version of the events of that night, her account tallies with the reported facts. Lack of adequate training in handling emergencies and in evacuation of the rig, led inevitably to the final, drastic conclusion. When the rig finally went down, at least some of the men got into the lifeboats, and rescue boats arrived from other rigs in the vicinity. But the violence of the storm, and the extreme cold, prevented any rescue attempts from succeeding. They were unable to pull anyone out of the water. They simply had to watch as the men died, and there was nothing they could do. It is hard to read these passages without weeping.

The men on the Seaforth Highlander saw the men in the water…The ropes are frozen, the men on board the Highlander were telling the men in the water. The men on the Highlander were compelled to narrate all their efforts so that the dying men would know unequivocally that they had not been abandoned…And there must have come a moment, Helen thinks, when all this shouting back and forth was no longer about turning the event around, because everybody on both sides knew there would be no turning it around. The men in the water knew they would die and the men on board knew the men in the water would die. But they kept on trying anyway.

And then all the shouting was just for company. Because who wants to watch a man being swallowed by a raging ocean without yelling out to him. They had shouted to the men in the water. They had tried to reach the men with grappling hooks. They saw them and then they did not see them. It was as simple as that. (pp. 272-274)

Moore's success with this book is attributable to her beautiful, heartfelt writing. We get drawn into the story from the first page and relive the tragedy of the accident through Helen’s recollections. We feel a connection with her as we get swept up in her own story. Whether we see her in the present, or as she thinks about the past, we always know what she is thinking and we understand her feelings. Her struggle to get on with life and deal with loneliness and hardship are things we can all relate to and Moore’s realistic portrayal makes Helen come alive. As we leave her behind we see some hope for the future, and for that I am glad.

Bookish Delights of 2012

I love having a birthday in early January. As the numbers for the calendar year change, along with my age, it feels like the right time to look back at the year just past. And what a wonderful year it was for bookish adventures.

The books I read were fun, challenging, intriguing, and covered more genres than ever before. I read poetry, non-fiction, biographies, mysteries, YA, short stories and literary fiction, with themes that included sports, mental illness, history, exploration, relationships and coming of age. Of course there were some disappointments but there were also some absolute gems. I laughed out loud to Jess Walter’s Financial Lives of the Poets, and fell a little bit more in love with Commissario Guido Brunetti each time I read one of Donna Leon’s wonderful Venetian mysteries. Chad Harbach charmed me with The Art of Fielding, as did Anne Giardini and her Advice to Italian Boys; both are tender stories told with insight and humour. I enjoyed Annabel Lyon’s depiction of Aristotle in The Golden Mean and finished up the year with the wonderful The Juliet Stories by Carrie Snyder. But I think my overall favourite for the year was Mr. Roger and Me by Marie-Renée Lavoie. How could you not love Hélène/Joe with her sense of adventure, love of family and salty tongue?

In addition to the reading, several book-related things happened to make this year one of the most memorable for me. First of all was the Twitter phenomenon/movement called #todayspoem, which began right at the end of 2011. This is how it all started: http://bit.ly/XfUfLX The basic idea is to begin your day with a poem (or end it, or just take a poetry break at some point during the day) and tweet a line or a link to it on Twitter, to share with fellow poetry lovers. The idea spread gradually, and now includes something like 240 contributors. When you search for #todayspoem you are presented with a stream of poetry tweets from a wide range of styles, in several languages, sometimes with audio or video. They are beautiful, amusing, evocative, graphic, and arresting. I’ve read more poetry this year than ever before in my life, and it is a constant delight. Some of my favourite poetry books were Richard Sommers’ Cancer Songs, Runaway Dreams by Richard Wagamese and Hologram by P. K. Page.

Something else that grew out of Twitter was meeting other women who enjoy both knitting and reading, especially Canadian Literature. How lovely to find kindred spirits. After some discussion, it seemed that the most obvious thing to do was to form a book club. Thus, the unique CanLitKnit was born! We meet at a pub, bring along our knitting and discuss the latest book on the agenda. So far we have picked short stories (Better Living Through Plastic Explosives by Zsuzsi Gartner, Too Much Happiness by Alice Munro and Sleeping Funny by Miranda Hill) all written by Canadian women but all so very different. It is a fun, lively way to spend the afternoon and I feel privileged and grateful to be part of this group with so much energy and enthusiasm for reading and for creating beautiful hand-made items.

Reading and knitting also came together when Coteau books sent out a call for readers who liked to knit. They wanted to match up a knitter with each author on their spring book tour, with the knitter creating a garment or accessory for the author to wear on the tour, inspired by elements from their book. Of course I applied immediately and was thrilled to be picked for the FictionKNITsta Tour, along with two others from the CanLitKnit group! I was assigned to Cordelia Strube. After reading her book Milosz (which I adored) and browsing through many patterns, I settled on a scarf that synthesizes some of the book’s themes and will look great on Cordelia. (She has a vague idea of what I am doing but there will also be an element of surprise for her.) I can’t wait for the May tour to meet all the participants and see the authors wearing their fabulous garments.

Partway through the year I discovered a book called The Anatomy of Edouard Beaupré, by Sarah Kathryn York, a work of fiction based on the life of the Willow Bunch Giant. It really touched me and I am still pondering how to put my ideas and feelings down on paper. I grew up knowing about the Giant, as my parents came from Willow Bunch and Beaupré was my Uncle Ovila’s uncle. Beaupré lived a short, troubled life. He died at the age of 23 on July 3, 1904, while performing at the World’s Fair in St. Louis. His parents could not afford to bring him back to Willow Bunch for burial because of his size, and eventually his body ended up at the University of Montreal where it was used in teaching anatomy. My uncle Ovila discovered this by accident in the 70s and it took another 20 years of negotiations with the university before he was able to bring Beaupré’s remains back to Willow Bunch for proper burial. Reading this book brought back  memories of summer visits to Willow Bunch, but also made me think about what life must have been like for The Giant, so different and yet the same as all of us. A very powerful little volume. (In the meantime, I have come across another writer intrigued by Beaupré’s story, this time a poet. Her book of poems about him is currently under review with a publisher—fingers crossed.)

Last but not least, I started participating in the reading program Paws4Stories which I wrote about in my last post. My dog, Charlie, spreads happiness wherever he goes, and the fact that he is encouraging new, young readers to discover the joys of reading makes my heart swell.

The past year was wonderful and the new one has begun with David Bergen’s Age of Hope, one of the books in contention for Canada Reads. With such a great start I have high hopes for 2013.

We need to talk about Charlie

I just have to say a few words about my dog Charlie, the incredible therapy dog.

As I’ve written before, Charlie and I are volunteers with St. John Ambulance. We’ve been visiting at a local retirement home for the last two years and a special needs class in a senior public school for the past year. Charlie is always excited to pay a visit; he loves the attention, he makes everyone laugh, he gets belly rubs, and his tail never stops wagging. Pure doggie bliss.

We also participate in a popular reading program with the Mississauga Library System, called “Paws4Stories.” Here’s how it works. Kids who are having a hard time with reading aloud, for whatever reason, can sign up for the program at their library. They come to the Children’s Department and read aloud to a dog, who sits or lies beside them or near them or in their lap, while they read a story of their choosing (usually dog-related of course!) It is a completely supportive, non-interfering, non-judgemental environment for the child, and heaven for the dog. 

The first time we did this was very exciting. We went to the Erin Meadows Library which is in a busy community centre. We had to walk through hordes of people waiting to get into the pool, or on their way to other activities in the building. By the time we got to the library, Charlie was already very stimulated, and then the library itself… (Have you been to a local library lately, and in particular a Children’s Department? It’s bright and open, filled with active kids, and it is very noisy!) We were shown to a beautiful little area filled with colourful toys and bean bag chairs, with many, many windows. (Nice and low of course, just right for short people and dogs). Charlie enjoyed himself exploring, but then we had to sit down and try to ignore the world around us while a sweet little girl read us a Scooby-Doo book. He didn’t do too badly, but I did have to help him “refocus” several times!

By November, our third time around, Charlie was an old hand. He was very happy to be there, but seemed relatively calm. A lovely young girl came and sat with us and she and Charlie clicked immediately. He snuggled up beside her and didn’t stir once while she read. She gently stroked his side and belly with her left hand while she held the book with her right. The two of them were off in their own world and I simply sat and listened, entranced by her voice and the sight of her and Charlie so connected. She must have read for almost half an hour but the time flew by and Charlie didn’t move until it was time to stop. Wonderful.

I enjoy all the visiting with Charlie and believe that he does a lot of good, with his goofiness, his friendliness, his curiosity, and his indiscriminate affection. I love visiting the older people at the retirement home and the young students with special needs, and Charlie seems to enjoy it too. If he can make a difference in someone’s life by interacting with them, I’m glad to be part of that. And if he can help an early reader start to realize all the joy of reading that is waiting, then I am ecstatic.

If you have a dog and have considered volunteering, think about the Therapy Dogs Program. What better way to volunteer than with your own lovable dog? It simply can’t be beat. 

Oh, and one last thing. Charlie was just awarded a certificate for completing over 75 visits. Pretty good work for someone who’s only four years old!

Milosz, FictionKNITsta update

Over the weekend I made a few decisions about the FictionKNITsta project. 

After having read the book and thinking about it for a few weeks, I decided a scarf would be the most appropriate thing to knit. Several times in the book, Milosz is found lying down with a scarf on his face; the scarf was left behind by his ex-girlfriend and he lies there with it on his face, as though he is trying to breathe her in. He lifts it up and lets it float back down onto him again, and it is such an evocative image. He misses her terribly but has no clue what to do to bring her back into his life.

So, the item will be a scarf. But what about the colour, the style, the yarn? I chose green because of the many references to growth, plants and gardening, and picked a plant-based yarn for the same reason. Cordelia loves scarves and she is very tall so this will be a super-long scarf to wind around her neck several times or wear very, very long. Since it is a plant fibre, it is very soft and will drape beautifully.

I chose this http://www.ravelry.com/patterns/library/thayer for the pattern. It is very lacy and open and light, perfect for the Spring tour. It looks complicated but is actually a four-row repeat so should actually be relatively simple to reproduce.(In theory! We'll see—as I've never knitted lace before, this could be interesting!) But I wanted something with a regular pattern because of Robertson, Milo's neighbour who is autistic and needs to see order and patterns in his life.

So, I have the pattern and the yarn. What next? Now to do some swatches with this yarn that I wound last night. It is VERY soft, so I think it will be a challenge to knit with. So, swatch with the good yarn, test the pattern with some scrap yarn, and start the scarf! Wish me luck and I'll keep you posted!